Compassion and Kindness
Darwin was incorrectly credited with the phrase, “Survival of the fittest.” In actuality he was a huge proponent of “Survival of the kindest.” Being kind to one another is instinctual if we are all going to survive. If we don’t take care of ourselves we will be miserable, depressed and perish before our time. I think I know you. When you see people suffering you want to reach out. You want to help. Empathy and compassion lives inside you.
Empathy is the ability to feel what another person is feeling. Compassion is empathy and includes actively helping those that suffer. Well I think all of us need loving compassion and kindness to heal ourselves. We are so hard on ourselves. Beating ourselves up for not being thin, pretty, smart or giving enough whether we are aware of it or not.
Stop and list ten unkind things you said about yourself this morning or last night. With compassion, which is the active part of empathy, with loving kindness take your arms and give yourself a hug. Yes, I mean it. Grab yourself and give yourself a hug. Tell yourself you are sorry. It is this beautiful dose of forgiveness that acknowledges we are not perfect but are still lovable and worthy. Period.
To change the way you live in your home you have to forgive yourself for the messes too. Decluttering forces you to look at yourself, your habits, your imperfect decision making and excuses. There will be a lot of forgiving and having a kindness mindset. A kindness mindset means failure in the past is not a predictor of failure in the future. You are smart, capable and damn resourceful. Stay creative as you press through the messes. If you tried “A” and “B” in the past look further for “C.” Doing the same thing isn’t an option.
You are learning. Like a toddler or a brain surgeon you are learning. The learning you extract is not punishment but empowerment. What would you do if you saw this toddler struggle. You would help them with beautiful compassion. Have the image of yourself as a toddler. Go find a picture of yourself at an age when innocence shown clearly on your face. Hold this beautiful innocence as a reminder when you make mistakes. Learn from them. Always remember to treat yourself with compassion and kindness today and everyday.
